Apology Flowers

I learned something a couple days ago- you don’t need to be married to give someone apology flowers. Some might say “duh” but let me explain: 

My roommate and I set off on our adventure down to Southern Oregon July 2015, shortly after I graduated from Oregon State, she had graduated in 2014. It’s been a little over a year now and the whole experience has come full circle. We’ve always been close but this adventure has brought us closer than ever before because we’re learning how to adult together. Yes, adulting is a verb in my book.

Things had been a little off with us for a couple weeks on my end. I was thinking “we definitely need to talk about this but we will and then we’ll move on and go do whatever it is we do” which is typically grabbing a drink or two with our friends and avoiding adult responsibilities after a long day of said responsibilities.  

I get her flowers as a precursor to the conversation because I had made the situation worse by throwing an absolute fit over something I found out never even happened- negative adult point. I didn't get them because I felt like I had to, I got them because it was a kind gesture and I had realized that I was an asshole earlier. Also, who doesn’t love flowers? 

As the conversation unfolds she tells me that we’ve had something funky between us since May, keep in mind it’s September, almost October, at this point and I’m absolutely floored. I had no idea. Also, super glad I got the flowers at this point because it’s almost like I did know.  

We talk more and I find out that while I was really unhappy here in Medford she was unsure of how to handle me. For anyone who knows me, this is a full time job in itself. I turn into an absolute bear when I’m cranky about my life. So all this time has gone by and I had no idea that she felt this way and it drove me nuts to feel that way for a couple of weeks.  

No we aren’t married but we are learning invaluable skills in doing life with someone. How do we make sure we’re both happy? What’s the protocol for making plans? How do we make up after a fight? As professional singles, we haven’t had to deal with these questions. We get to learn how to communicate with one another, get through the victories and the disappointments and even if we’re a little snappy, we’re getting it figured out like mature adults.  

WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING TO US?

  

We’re growing up. We’re growing together while doing our own things on our own career paths at the same time and it’s a pretty damn cool feeling. We have a lot to learn but it really is something special when you have someone to share life with. Be it a spouse, boyfriend or best friend.