Writing is a powerful tool when it comes
to expressing myself. I find that whenever I’m stressed or feeling confused
that if I just start writing I will usually end up figuring it out.
If I’m stressed out, it feels like my thoughts
are intertwined and tangled up in my head but writing forces me to pull on the
one string I can actually distinguish and loop it over and under the other
strings to pull apart the mess and get it straightened out. That way I can read
through what I’ve expressed and realize what I’m thinking overall.
I can’t take it back. It’s written
down, it’s out there, and it’s honest. This is why I write letters
to the people that I care about, even if they don’t care about me anymore.
Whether it’s a friend, a family member, or a romantic interest I see writing as
letting them know exactly where they stand with me. When I write, I get this
tunnel vision. I can’t hear anything except for the next word or phrase that I’m
going to write down, which some call flow. Whatever it is, it’s 125% Justin.
Whether I’m writing a letter to a friend
to tell them how much they mean to me, to someone I’ve dated to explain things from
my end as honestly as I can, to express that I have no idea why our friendship
completely fell apart, or a blog post to share my thoughts with a wider
audience, it gives me closure on whatever topic I’m writing about and calms my
anxiety. It’s therapeutic in a way that nothing else has ever been able to give
me, while also letting the people I’ve come into contact with know exactly how
I feel about them so there’s no “what ifs” or “how does he really feel?”
Nah.
You know exactly how I feel. That can be
a heartwarming thing, heartbreaking thing, maddening thing or just simply a
thing. Regardless of the outcome, I can walk with a clear mind and move on to
whatever else is coming my way.
